The List: 5 Things to Get This Slimy Jellyfish Off My Head

{image by Zhou Fan}

Folks, I'm in a hardcore rut {otherwise known as a funk} right now. I think this dilemma is fairly normal for people who read and write for a living. Does this ever happen to you? I start feeling guilty for not reading or writing the "right" things {i.e. for my dissertation}, so I just stop doing anything -- I feel guilty for not doing what I'm supposed to do, so I just stop doing all the things I like. What a bad idea! It's a bit like having a big jellyfish sitting atop your head and sucking all of the motivation out. Slurp! I think I need to change up my routine and try some new things for inspiration. One cannot go around bound by a sea creature. Here are a few rut-fighting activities I'm going to try:

1. Costume movie night! After watching the Oscar's, I decided I needed to see every film nominated in the costume category. I am going to try and watch all of them over the next several weeks...and maybe write some reviews here? The nominees are: The Young Victoria, Coco avant Chanel, The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus, Bright Star, Nine...and I'll add A Single Man for good measure.

2. Eat at a new restaurant. There is a new Indian restaurant {Kolam} here I've been meaning to try.

3. Go on a hike. If you know me, this might sound a little...out-of-character. But, seriously the weather is so lovely, and I'm just dying to wander through the woods. OK, so maybe it will be less of a hike and more of a stroll.

4. Go to free yoga. The Yoga Room here in Tulsa has free yoga every Monday. Ask me why haven't gone. I have no idea!

5. Write my F*cking dissertation prospectus! There, I said it. We all know this is the real reason I'm in a rut. My boyfriend compared my dilemma to the Clash's "Guns of Brixton" lyrics: "How you gonna come?/ With your hands on your head / Or on the trigger of your gun?" In other words: I need to decide if I'm going to come out fighting or just give up. The fighting option sounds much more exciting {and yes, my boyfriend makes strange, wonderful music analogies}.

Readers, please share, what do you do to get out of a rut??

Blog it Forward: What Inspires Me?

French fashion bloggers! Pandora and The Cherry Blossom Girl use fashion as an expression of their love of history, art, and their beautiful city -- Paris.

It's time for the "Blog it Foward Mashup." This project was started by the talented San Francisco Girl by the Bay as a way for bloggers to share what inspires them. It's a bit like a chain letter for blogs, and today it's my turn. Check out the links at the end of this post to see who is coming up next...I'm pretty sure you'll be addicted {like I am!}. Or, you can find your favorite bloggers on the full schedule here.

Traveling to strange, out-of-the-way destinations. I've visited some bizarre places, like the Surrealist Folly Gardens in Xilitla, Mexico, and the desert art communes in Marfa, Texas, but there are so many unusual spots I'm dying to explore: the Absinthe Museum in New Orleans and the Seti satellites in Puerto Rico are at the top of my list.

Strong, eccentric women with a flare for the dramatic. Tilda Swinton is always unflinchingly original {left, dressed as the Marchessa Casati}, and Anais Nin lived a life more fascinating than even her books reveal.

Art, both new and old. The brilliant Hayv Kahraman is a recent discovery {left} and decadent artist Aubrey Beardsley is an obsession that will never fade...

Books that move, challenge, disgust, and inspire in equal parts... these are two books that changed my perception of literature forever.

Eating...and cooking: the ultimate creative act. It inspires and nourishes. Since discovering my love for cooking, I have come to realize that making food can be as fulfilling {and filling} as making art...corny but true. {Images via Canelle et Vanille}.

Vintage magazines and vintage advertising. I would wallpaper my apartment with vintage ads if I could! I think vintage ad designers are truly forgotten artistic geniuses...

What inspires you, dear readers??

And coming up in the Blog it Forward Mash-up:

• not your average ordinary 3/3 • occupation housewife 3/4 • oh hello! 3/5

• oh, hey great 3/8 • oh, mishka 3/9 • oh so beautiful paper 3/10

• old sweet song 3/11

Happy Valentine's Day!

I love you J.B.!!!! You have the uncanny ability to make even the smallest moments sparkle with laughter, irreverence, and fun...

"I am like a falling star who has finally found her place next to another in a lovely constellation, where we will sparkle in the heavens forever.” ~Amy Tan

The List: Erotic Poetry

And down his mouth comes to my mouth! and down
His bright dark eyes come over me, like a hood
Upon my mind! his lips meet mine, and a flood
Of sweet fire sweeps across me, so I drown
Against him, die, and find death good.

~D.H. Lawrence

What better time to indulge in a bit of erotic-love poetry than Valentine's Day? I've always been drawn to poets who are able to turn the most carnal, bodily aspects of love into something utterly transcendent. Historically, erotic poetry has been able to stay under-the-radar and escape censorship in the western world, even when its contents were graphically sexual. Unlike the novel, which has seen its fair share of censoring, poetry seems to quietly evade accusations of pornography. I recently learned that beat poet Allen Ginsberg's 1956 poem "Howl" was one of the only poems brought to trial in the U.S. for obscenity. The charges were dropped, because the judge decided the poem had "redeeming social importance." How fascinating to think that what one person considers smut, another person considers an important expression of very human experiences...

::Here are some of my favorite erotic poems/poets, and while they certainly seem tame to us today, they still manage to speak to us in a beautifully carnal way!

• Charles Algernon Swinburne's decadent "Love and Sleep."
• The erotic lyrics of the ancient Greek poetess Sappho.
• Walt Whitman's virile "I Sing the Body Electric."
• D.H. Lawrence's sexy, rustic "Love on the Farm" {one of my all-time favorites}.
• ee cumming's ode to the act of love: "i like my body when it is with your body."
• The lesbian lyrics of {two women lovers with one name} Michael Field.
• The desperate longing of the late Victorian poet Charlotte Mew.

**What are some of your favorite love/erotic poems?? Why not have a private poetry reading...just you and your honey??

Happy Weekend of Love, my Dears!

A Friend Who "Feels" You

Reading Daniel J. Siegel's inspiring new book Mindsight, I was struck by his notion that "feeling felt" emotionally by another person is crucial for healthy childhood and adolescent development. Everyone has their share of difficulties growing up {some more than others}, but Siegel argues that as long as we have a person in our life we feel a connection with, be it a friend or a family member, our chances of becoming strong, resilient, happy adults increase exponentially.
Siegel says: "Being close to someone early in our lives gives us the clarity to know how we feel, and the ability to feel close to others."

This concept made me think of my oldest friend: Sara. I realized that in great part I have my precious friend Sara to thank for my relative balance and happiness as a "grown up." Sara and I both dealt with some rather difficult and traumatic experiences as teenagers, and I truly believe if it weren't for her love, support, and humor through those tough years, that I would probably be a terribly cranky, pessimistic, and downright antisocial person these days. I think I can safely say, more than any other person in my life {then or now}, Sara truly "felt" me! I hope I gave her at least a fraction of that experience, as well. Thanks so much dear Sara.

::Tell me readers, who is the person who has made you feel "felt" the most in your own life?? Don't forget to send them some love for Valentine's!! ♥♥♥

{And aren't these vintage lady friends super-cute in their jodhpurs??}

Blog It Forward...

Hello, my peaches. I wanted to let you all know about a fun project I will be participating in -- and you should, too! The Blog It Forward Mashup is headed up by the talented lady behind sfgirlbybay. Check out the details on her site, and drop Victoria a line if you want to take part. We’re going to share a connected stream of blogger posts on ‘what inspires us the most’ on our individual blogs, but link back & forward to the other blogs participating, a bit like a chain letter (but, hopefully a lot less annoying!).

This should be fun...

A Little "Ta-Ra--Ra-Boom De-Ay" for Your Mon-De-Ay

Tell me this fun little ditty doesn't get stuck in your head the rest of the day! I've been envisioning myself Cancan dancing in a big pink dress ever since I found this on Youtube. Here's what the historian Holbrook Jackson had to say about this all-too-catchy tune:

"In the 1890's the chorus song "Ta-Ra-Ra-Boom-De-Ay" spread like a dancing flame through the land, obsessing the minds of young and old, gay and sedate until it became a veritable song-pest, provoking satires upon itself, even in the music halls of its origins. No song ever took a people in quite the same way: from 1892 to 1896 it affected the country {England} like an epidemic..."

The version above is from the 1940's film "Happy Go Lucky," but the original songstress that took the popular American song and turned it into a hit in England, was singer/dancer Lottle Collins. While touring in vaudeville in the United States in 1891, she heard the song "Ta-ra-ra Boom-de-ay!" After she sang it at the Tivoli Music Hall in London in November 1891, it became her signature piece {source}. And isn't she divine!? No wonder the song was such a hit...

::More about the lovely Lottie Collins here.

The List: 20 Things to Do When You're Snowed-In and Stir Crazy

{Photo via DeZeen}

Readers, we've been attacked with a bad case of winter weather here again. There is slushy, icy yuckiness as far as the eye can see. This has me wondering how much of this I can take before moving my frozen butt to a tropical island. But, in the attempt to see the positive in this situation, I asked myself: what are some creative things to do when you're stuck inside and waiting for the first bloom of spring? Aside from the usual napping and eating, I think these activities might actually stave off wintry boredom:

1. Go through your magazines or the photos on your computer and make a fashion inspiration folder/file.
2. Update and add to your Netflix queue or Amazon book wishlist.
3. Look through your cookbooks or look online for recipes you would love to try and make a recipes-to-make list.
4. Play a drinking game. So what if it's the middle of the day?
5. Rakata. My mother learned this word from her Puerto Rican boyfriend. If you don't speak Spanish, look it up.
6. Finish a book. I have at least 7 books around here that I've started...
7. Play dress-up, then clean out your closet.
8. Organize/digitize your photos.
9. Play cards. Canasta is a favorite. And no, I'm not elderly.
10. Get busy with that label-maker. Nothing makes you feel more organized that labeling everything.
11. Download new music, or make themed playlists, such as: "Music to Rakata To," or "Music for a Snowy Day When You're Pissed Off and Stuck Inside."
12. Discover new blogs -- play "follow the blue links" and see where it leads you. I've found some of my favorite blogs this way.
13. Mani/Pedi/Facial. 'Nuff said.
14. Call an old friend. You actually have time to chat!
15. Read some poetry, and then try writing one of your own. But, don't ask people to read it -- that's just awkward.
16. E-mail 5 people you love and tell them you're thinking about them.
17. Balance your budget. Well, when are you going to do it otherwise?
18. Get out the Ouija board!
19. Listen to an audio book: a method I discovered for being lazy AND literary.
20. Sell stuff on Ebay. Make some money to put toward a one-way ticket to a tropical island.

::What are your secrets for surviving winter weather??

A Loving Ode to Your Stuff and Mine...

{all photos via ffffound}

This might sound strange, but I love my stuff: all of my little quirky collections, hand-me-downs, gifts received from friends and loved ones over the years. Does this make me materialistic? Well...yes! But, maybe materialism doesn't have to be such a dirty word. What if we thought of it this way: if you are materialistic, you cherish your things, you see them as connecting you with others, both past and present; you value the things you have worked hard for; you are deeply sentimental. This doesn't mean you are necessarily greedy or even that cherish objects more than people. Perhaps it just means you find value and comfort in the things you have lovingly gathered around you.

The people we often accuse of being materialistic are typically the ones who see their stuff as ephemeral, replaceable, throwaway -- the ones who are always after the next best, biggest, blinking object of desire. But, this isn't materialism, this is the opposite -- this is a blatant dissatisfaction with possessions, a driving need to fill a void with more and more and more to no avail...

I would like to bring "materialism" back into the light, take away its status as a dirty word, and renew our connection with the things that fill our homes and hearts. I'm not calling for a preoccupation or obsession with stuff, but rather, a simple nod to the value our unique posessions bring to our life -- however small, strange, or worthless they might seem to others. Let's give our stuff a little love!!

List Love!

List-making is like a glorious disease: you are compelled, driven mad by the gnawing desire to makes lists for everything from "All the Food I Still Need to Eat Before I Die" to "Movies I Have Seen That Made Me Want to Remove My Eyeballs." I make lists for the esoteric, the inspirational, the everyday, and the mundane. One of my favorite newer features on this blog is...you guessed it: "The List."

What kind of lists would you like to see more of here on Nothing Elegant? Personal, art-related, books, fashion-focused, local tid-bits?

...stay tuned for lists I already have up my sleeve, such as: my favorite dirty poetry; the best stop-motion animation films; women rockers whose style I want to steal; weird vacation spots; concerts to put on your calendar this year...and more.


::More links for the list-related: A place to indulge your addiction / Airam also shares my penchant for lists / List-makers with a twist / A secret society / My all-time favorite place to buy list-making materials.

Happy New Year: Bonne Année 2010!

This year, in the tradition of the French, I am going to make a wish or two {a voeu} instead of the usual stringent resolutions I have made...and often broken...in years past. Doesn't it just seem more romantic and less puritan to send a wish out into the universe, rather than setting yourself up for punishment when you fail? Author Debra Ollivier says:

"...a wish is a mutable thing that can be blown away by the wind. A wish is like a cloud that might drift your way but cannot be forced to do so. It is langurous and fanciful and who knows where it will end up. A resolution, on the other hand, is a firm, concise obligation. It's a contract between you and your conscious that is deep-fried in moral values. A resolution has edges and they will menace you forever if you don't pay attention to them. A resolution, in short, can become one of those deadly virtues if it conspires too radically against the Gods of Pleasure."

This year, despite loads of work and obligations, I wish for the "Gods of Pleasure" to stay front and center in my life...good food, good drink, good books, good love, good adventures, good growth, good living.

** Happy New Year, Mes Amies!!! May pleasure visit you often this year...

Merry Christmas!

I want to wish everyone a wonderful holiday with friends and family! I will be leaving tomorrow for Tennessee, and posting will probably be spotty for a week or so...hope you'll stick with me.

I look forward to the upcoming year, and I'm already pondering new posts and projects for this blog. I have one particular project in the works that I'm excited about...more info soon.

Have a beautiful holiday, my wonderful readers!!!

The List: Books Worth Kissing Santa For

...fuzzy beard and all!

::Grunge by Michael Lavine.

::Magic: 1400's-1950's / On Ugliness by Umberto Eco.

::1000 Degrees: Deyrolle.

::I Love Your Style by Amanda Brooks / I Know How to Cook by Ginette Mathiot

::Baroque Baroque by Stephen Calloway.

Weekend Links

{Mind-boggling wallpaper from Tapeten Agentur}

I've spent most of the day so far catching up on blog-reading and staring at my prettily-wrapped packages. I finished all of my holiday shopping early this year, and now I can just sit back and enjoy! I tried to buy most of my gifts on Etsy, and it feels much more meaningful than the hustle and bustle of the mall and the big department stores. How is your list coming along?? If you're still stressing about finding something special for that someone special, be sure to check out my gift guide for those hard-to-buy for folks on your list. I truly hope you are all able to relax, breathe, and enjoy this time of year...

Here are some fun links for your spare time!

::You can certainly find memorable items on Etsy...the ones featured on the hilarious Regretsy are just memorable in a different way.

::Hey, local-yokels! Check out the tips and restaurant reviews on Tulsa Food Blog.

::Dandies and Quaintrelles is a club I would be honored to be a member of -- be sure to check out the images from their "Tweed Ride" on their Facebook page!

::A compelling talk on how technology enables intimacy.

::What I wouldn't give to be in NYC for Tim Burton's exhibition at MOMA.

::An Education: 60's era period piece film -- looks romantic, beautiful and inspiring!

::There is no rest for the wallpaper obsessed; awe-inspiring wall art at Decor8.

::My bar area is currently being taken over by Christmas gifts, but as soon as the holiday season is over, I'm going experiment some more with chic-ifying it...using these photos as inspiration!

Calendar Giveaway!

Just a quick reminder: don't forget to enter my holiday giveaway for a chance to get your hands on a fabulous, limited edition, hand printed calendar by artist Jen Hewitt. The deadline is tonight at midnight: click here for entry rules. Best of luck!!

The Joy of Gossip

Barbara Walters once said, "Show me someone who doesn't gossip, and I'll show you someone who isn't interested in people." Gossip's got a bad name, and I think it might be high-time to rescue it from the realms of tawdry tabloid nonsense and mean-spirited fibbing. Is it crazy to think that gossip might actually be healthy when practiced in moderation? In her book, The Art of Conversation, Catherine Blyth suggests that good, old-fashioned gossip is a balm to society's increasingly alienated sense of community and intimacy. She says:

"To me, gossip is a growth industry, ever more essential in atomized urban society, as family ties weaken and networks grow wider, looser, and diffuser...While monitoring a virtual crowd of internet pals can accentuate loneliness if you're not truly in touch, gossip remains frienship's primary medium...{103}"

I think of gossip as a form of social analysis -- like talk therapy, minus the person who probably needs the therapy. People are fascinating. I want to know what makes them tick, why they say and do the things they do {I'm also a bit obsessed with self-analysis, but that's a subject for another time...}. You will rarely find me gossiping about people I don't like, or who, at the very least, I don't find interesting. You will also never find me making something up about someone out of boredom or animosity. People are far too interesting for this to be necessary!

Here are some more reasons why we could all use a dose of healthy gossip:

• It makes us feel better -- it allows us to see that things could be worse; at least we don't have that habit, problem, or compulsion!
• It gets us excited. Have you ever noticed how animated people get, how their eyes light up, when you tell them you have a juicy tid-bit?
• It's an amazing conversation catalyst. Is the discussion creeping to a halt? Mentioning a mutual friend's latest faux-pas usually gets things animated again.
• It creates a bond. Any time friends can get together and analyze, relish, question, ponder, or simply laugh at something {or someone} together, intimacy and understanding grows.

I certainly hope I've given others occasion to gossip about me from time-to-time. How awful to think I've never done anything shocking enough to merit being gossiped about!

::What's your stance on gossip? Is all gossip bad gossip?

{P.S. I hope you didn't mind the crass, but hilarious, MikWright image above!}

Holiday Giveaway: 2010 Shoes Wall Calendar by Jen Hewitt

I was going to wait until the beginning of December for this giveaway, but I'm just so excited about it {and I'm already feeling the holiday spirit}, so I'm going to announce it now. This contest features an adorable, original silkscreened calendar by printmaker Jen Hewitt, featuring what else but...shoes! It's definitely a classier alternative to that calendar you received last year with kittens in a red wagon...just sayin'!

Here are the rules:

1. In the "comments" section of this post, tell me about a holiday tradition you share with family {or friends}. It can be quirky and unique, it can be something particular to your country or home town, or it can just be simple and clever. Whatever it is, I want to know! Also, provide me with your e-mail address, so I can contact you if you win.
2. The contest ends in one week from today {Monday, Nov. 30} at midnight.
3. I will pick my favorite comment, and the contest winner will be announced on December 1st.

::If you're curious about Jen Hewitt's prints, check out her Etsy shop here.

*I look forward to reading your comments!

Cheers, Tara

xoxo